You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
