HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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