shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I pour the whiskey from now on
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
