first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
