I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
vagina is talking i cant
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
