Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
