Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
