As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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