Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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