More tranny stories later!
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
