My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I need to calm my uterus...
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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