So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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