i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
do herpes really smell.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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