Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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