we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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