Tell her she can't have a vagina
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Randomize
