Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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