I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
