alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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