How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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