Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
