What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
