I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
