lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize