K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
