I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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