I'm jealous of your bromance
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
