ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize