Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Fuck me I smell like cheese
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
