you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize