"it" just moved
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize