How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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