she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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