he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
