i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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