I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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