I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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