just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
