I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
