You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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