just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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