Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
