i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Randomize
