I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
