Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
