They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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