waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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