We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
