so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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