She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Bring me that man meat
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
